Mama Always Says...

scottish:

hearin a really shitty pun
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makin a really shitty pun
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pottergenes:

basically

laughcentre:

deerpong:

I’m crying real tears rn


is he using his finger as a moustache

laughcentre:

deerpong:

I’m crying real tears rn

is he using his finger as a moustache

unclefather:

it’s arm day

unclefather:

it’s arm day

mszombi:

meladoodle:

one time when i was like 12 my dad wanted me to put a dvd in the dvd player and i was like ‘what do i get in return’ and he said ‘you can have half of the winnings of this stupid lotto ticket’ and he ended up winning 600,000 dollars and i was so pleased with myself. 300,000 dollars when youre 12 is pretty much like infinity dollars. he was so mad

Shit, man, $300,000 would be like infinity dollars to me now.

poryqon:

poryqon:

write my tombstone in emojis

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damn it

caseyanthonyofficial:

lohannahmontana:

sandandglass:

Source

Who ended it though. I wanna know that person.

I know. The balls on that person. I want to shake their hand.

parzival221:

shak1ra:

redevoted:

bowserfucker:

oknope:

imagine reading a book of all the lies you’ve told 

IDK what kind of lives you all are leading, but this sounds like the boringest shit. “Yes I sent that email.” “Yeah, I like your outfit.” “I was sick.” “My mom said no” “No I wasn’t crying.” “Yes I read the Terms of Service”

what about a book of all the lies people have told you

Oh how the tables have tabled

Tables have tabled

red-coffeemaker:

telapathetic:

america is just all the people europe didnt like

I guess you could say they were All American Rejects
misty-tears:

awwww-cute:

Moment of bravery at the vet

THIS LITTLE MUNCHKIN OH LORDD

misty-tears:

awwww-cute:

Moment of bravery at the vet

THIS LITTLE MUNCHKIN OH LORDD